


The Twenty-Fifth Rule

by paxnirvana



Series: The Twenty-Fifth Rule [1]
Category: Naruto
Genre: M/M
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2010-07-31
Updated: 2010-07-31
Packaged: 2017-10-10 21:14:49
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 7
Words: 14,385
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/104359
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/paxnirvana/pseuds/paxnirvana





	1. The Twenty-Fifth Rule

~*~*~*~*~

Rule Twenty-Five: No matter what happens, true shinobi must never - ever - show their emotions. The mission is the only priority. Carry that in your heart and never shed a tear.

\- - Shinobi Rules of Conduct [as stated by Sakura in Vol. 4]

~*~*~*~*~

  
Before the Chuunin Exam recommendations, he had felt nothing but professional respect for Hatake Kakashi and a budding, if vague, sense of communal purpose between them over Naruto's welfare.  Kakashi would occasionally, when he filed Cell 7's mission reports, share small tidbits of Naruto's progress with him.  This last time he had even felt a small flush of breathless pride when Kakashi mentioned how Naruto considered him, Iruka, as his hero and had chosen him as a goal to surpass -- even if there had been an odd light in the other man's single visible eye during that pronouncement had made him wonder if the other were mocking him some way.  

He didn't like to think so.  He was coming to look forward to his infrequent interactions with Hatake Kakashi.  The man could be distressingly… unique, but he was undeniably talented.  Iruka had hoped they could at least become friendly acquaintances, if not friends.  For Naruto's sake.

Because how wonderful and powerful Kakashi-sensei was was all the boy could talk about lately, after all.  That, and how annoying he found Sasuke…

But during the recommendation ceremony, when all three training masters promoted all their current students as candidates, Iruka's heart had grown suddenly heavy with dread and no little fear, and that respect had taken a blow.

Naruto... Sasuke... Sakura.  All of them were still so young.  He feared for them. But mostly for Naruto... who, despite his crude bluster, his reckless disregard for the rules was so fragile underneath it all.  A small boy trying to act big, yet still just as lonely and desperate for recognition; wanting only to be acknowledged and accepted and… and…  Iruka could still feel the ghost-memory of the wild, trembling joy in the boy's arms as he hugged him tight after Iruka had given him the _hitai-ate_ right off his own head to wear.  Recognizing him as adult in honor of the boy's courage and fortitude in the face of another teacher's betrayal.

It was Iruka's old _hitai-ate_ Naruto still wore.  

He had known it was out of place for a chuunin like him to speak up like that before the Hokage.  Had seen the impatient disgust and contempt in the other two jounin's eyes -- a mere Academy-chuunin like him daring to question the judgement of field-experienced jounin; only Hatake Kakashi had shown him no scorn, but had answered him with patient respect.  He had felt a brief lessening of the fluttering fear, the almost choking anxiety for Naruto for a moment then.  Until the jounin's inappropriate humor surfaced, before being followed by his final, chilling words;

_It's none of your business anyway... They're not your students anymore.  They're soldiers under my command._

Iruka trembled as conflicting emotion boiled inside of him.  He knew the duty and burden of being shinobi.  He was chuunin.  He knew the shinobi way.  His life was the Hokage's to demand at will.  But Naruto... the boy had suffered so much already.  Chosen without his consent or knowledge at birth to be the living prison for a powerful evil beast.  Shunned and scorned his whole life because of it when he should have been honored.  No matter the boy's ambition and bravado, he was still little more than a child alone and desperate for attention and affection... just like Iruka had been.

Naruto's sacrifice had been greater than anyone's.  To save the whole village, his entire future was destroyed.  And yet for that he was reviled.  Even though the child had not been to blame for the monster's appearance. To Iruka's private shame, it had taken him far too long to understand that himself.

They had both been orphaned by the Nine Tails.

After being dismissed with the rest of the chuunin so that the Hokage and the jounin could discuss details of the upcoming exam qualifications, Iruka stood in the hall outside the inner chamber.  While filing out, he had deliberately avoided the pitying gazes of his peers, shut out their speculative whispers.  He had stopped here to wait and compose himself again.  That was all.  He bent his head and clenched his hands to fists at his sides.  He was aware, on some level, that he was trembling in a most undisciplined way.  But he couldn't stop it.

Eight missions, at least.  For genin to have a respectable chance at passing, more than twice that was standard, preferably including at least a few C-class missions.  In practice, no genin who had not completed at least three C-class missions had been nominated to the chuunin exam in years.  Cell 7 had only been assigned one; a standard bodyguarding mission that had turned out to be A-class and had included defeating a powerful jounin renegade and his disciple. That Cell 7 had survived at all spoke volumes for either their talent... or their raw luck.  He shuddered again, frowning.

"Hey. Your chakra is spilling over, Iruka-sensei," a faintly bored voice announced from beside him.  

Startled, he jerked his head up and half-spun to face Hatake Kakashi. He hadn't heard or felt anyone approach in the hall.  The senior ninja stood in his usual half-slumped, deceptively inattentive posture. But Iruka knew he was neither – the other was still jounin.  Deception and misdirection were a shinobi's lifeblood.  The other met his glare calmly, his gaze unreadable save for what he knew had to be only a façade of bland amusement.  But as to what lay beneath he had no clue.

"Kakashi-sensei," he managed to grind out in reply.  Scarcely polite, but it met form's requirements.  He wrestled his chakra back under control, reining in the dismay and sense of helplessness rippling through him before it could loosen his tongue again.  He'd already risked his position at the Academy by questioning the jounin before the Hokage.  Perhaps he'd become too accustomed to the courtesy that the Hokage had granted him all too often recently of speaking his mind freely.  He'd abused the privilege today.  It would not do to insult the Hokage further by getting into a shouting match with one of the most senior jounin here in the halls of the Hokage's own house.

When his chakra had settled, the jounin smiled at him from behind his mask.  The expression faded after a moment as Iruka just continued to glare at him.

"I'm truly sorry to have disturbed you, Iruka-sensei," the other man said quietly after the silence had grown uncomfortably long. "But I recommended all my students for the exam because they are ready."

"Ready? They almost died!" he snapped, the frustration he was unable to keep suppressed any longer making him indiscreet.  Because he would never have known that if Naruto hadn't let it slip - while wondering how Sakura could still idolize that stuck-up Sasuke so much - that Sasuke had nearly died during their last mission at a renegade ninja's hands.  Though it was forbidden, Iruka had carefully drawn the boy out (it wasn't hard once Naruto had ramen in front of him) about what details he could of that terrible mission – sifting through the bluster and hyperbole until he was able to pick out the critical fragments of a sad tale of betrayal and bravery, heroes and tree-climbing.  It made little sense overall, the way Naruto told it, but the little he did glean left him cold.  

Something about being dead human tools.  And how Naruto refused to end up one.

But they were tools.  Shinobi were the tools of their villages; hands, eyes, bodies and souls.  Warriors.  Spies.  Assassins.  Thieves.  All tools.  And he had taught them that.  He had been the one who pounded the One Hundred Rules of Shinobi Conduct into their heads until nearly all could recite it letter-perfect.  Except Naruto, of course.  

Naruto…To teach something properly, one had to believe in it.  He'd always believed in the rules of conduct.  But now, thinking about it, his throat had gone oddly tight and his eyes ached.

"Only almost."  The airily thrown out words came with a casual shrug.  Iruka's heart beat slowly and ponderously in his chest, aching from the cavalier tone.  And it shouldn't.  What had changed inside of him when he took Naruto into his heart? When he opened himself to the boy who was even more unfortunate than he?

Had he lost or had he gained?

"I don't understand you," Iruka said huskily, swallowing hard and trying to tamp down the turmoil inside.  He would not let himself look away from the bland gaze that held his own.  "You've never passed a student on before and now you've passed on three in one cell. Why now?  Why them?"

"They're a good bunch," Kakashi said with a shrug, his expression unchanging.  Iruka could read nothing significant from the other, not with his own chakra held so tightly to keep his anxiety from bleeding over again.  Not that he'd likely be able to read the jounin effectively anyway.  Unless Kakashi allowed him to.  "Yes, they are," Iruka agreed sharply. "Which is why I don't want to see any of them disheartened by forcing them through the pressures of the Three Trials too soon!"

"It's not too soon.  Besides, they don't have to agree.  But they probably will." Another shrug, and this time the jounin stuck his hands into his pants pockets and somehow managed to slouch further, looking utterly unconcerned.  Anger flared inside Iruka, and he took a half-step forward, frowning at the other man.

"How can you judge accurately if you haven't ever taken students this far before!" he spat.

The single eye fixed on him, the gaze sharpening abruptly. "Who said I haven't?"

Iruka spluttered, taken aback by the edge to the response.  "I – I saw your Teacher's Book. You've never passed a candidate!"

"No, not me.  That's true," Kakashi said, the amused expression on his face clearly visible even through the dark cloth covering the lower half of it. "But I _have_ taught genin before -- just not for a while now.  How long have you been a teacher, eh?  Five years?  Then you probably never saw how the Hokage saves the real troublemakers for me."

"He's not a tr…" he began hotly in Naruto's defense, only to choke off the patently untrue protest before he could perjure himself further, flushing deeply.  Naruto had been a terrible troublemaker for years.  Pulling prank after prank on anyone and everyone. Seeking attention.  But even if he understood why, that didn't change the fact that the boy was trouble.  Iruka lowered his head and stared at the stone tile beneath his boots, shamed.  The words burned in his throat.  "He's not... bad. He has a good heart.  Please don't hurt him needlessly."

Kakashi remained silent, letting him stew, no doubt.  He winced, his own words echoing in his head.  What must the jounin think of him?  A chuunin and teacher pleading for mercy for a clanless genin -- lowest of the low and in need of the most toughening if he were to survive as shinobi in their harsh world.  That he was soft.  Weak.

But when the other finally did speak, Iruka's head jerked up in surprise.  "Ah. Now I see where they got it," Kakashi said quietly, staring at him steadily from behind his mask.  The odd light was back in the single eye.  For some reason it made the blood flow hot to Iruka's face.  Blushing.  He was blushing.  Shame grew.

But, "Got what?" he asked before he could stop himself, horrifying himself further.  His control was utterly gone again.  Because of his worry for Naruto, of course.

"Their compassion," the jounin said, eye crinkling up in a sudden smile as he pulled his hands out of his pockets to clap them on Iruka's shoulders heartily once before leaving them to rest there, squeezing lightly in tandem with his next words. "Well done, sensei."  Iruka felt his heart jerk in his chest in shock, his breath stop up in his throat.  He could only stare, speechless, at the other man as he went on, "Mind, it can be a real pain in the ass sometimes, but… I think I like it."

Iruka's eyes went wide in disbelief and he could only gape.  After a long second, he somehow managed to find enough breath to say - in a strangled voice - "Are you calling me a pain in the ass, Hatake-jounin?"  

"Eh? Well, yes. But not in a bad way."  The firm hands resting on his shoulders prevented him from taking a step back as the other man continued to beam at him. Iruka blinked.  Yes, that was a broad smile beneath the clinging mask.  It was faintly unnerving to see.  Then a trickle of energy brushed his chakra and made him quiver; he reeled inside from the unexpected and disconcertingly intimate encounter with the other man's aura.  

He shouldn't be able to feel a jounin's chakra unless the other were actually using some kind of jutsu.  Was he?  Why?  Iruka swallowed hard and tried to stay alert, even knowing how badly he was outclassed.  "Kakashi-sensei?"

"Yeah?"  The smile eased back to a grin.  The eye twinkled.

"Why… why are you holding on to my shoulders?"

Kakashi let out a puff of air that could have meant anything or nothing.  "On that last mission, we ran into a boy with a _mizu kekkai genkai_. The boy had been abandoned... then picked up by Momochi Zabuza." Kakashi was still smiling at him from beneath his mask and purposely skewed _hitai-ate_, but it was a more melancholy expression now.  Iruka's breath hissed in as he abruptly realized the jounin already knew he'd questioned Naruto in depth about his last mission.  After a brief nod of mutual acknowledgement, Kakashi went on. "The boy's name was Haku.  His only reason for existing was to serve the Demon – to follow his orders, serve him, kill for him.  But the boy spent some time talking to Naruto… I'm not certain exactly what about.  When he was ordered to kill Sasuke and Naruto, instead he paralyzed Sasuke, fought Naruto to a standstill and then allowed himself to be killed taking a blow in defense of Zabuza."

Iruka couldn't stop the tremble that ran through him. A kill already? He hadn't known…  Eyes wide, he reached up and gripped Kakashi's forearms.  Squeezed hard. "Th-they didn't... w-who... which of them killed...?"

"Don't worry.  I did it." Kakashi said, and all mirth faded from his expression until it was as impassive as a ninja's should be.  Iruka stared into his eye, riveted.  "When it was all over, Naruto cried for the boy."

"He d-didn't tell me..." Iruka whispered, heart aching for Naruto.

"Doesn't surprise me," Kakashi said, shrugging.  The motion shook Iruka as well, making him sharply aware that the other man was still touching him, and that there was more energy – definitely jutsu – surrounding them now.  "Haku reminded me of someone," Kakashi went on.  "Only he wasn't as lucky as that someone.  The man who saved him wanted only to use him... it was only when it was too late that the man who used him discovered what his greed had cost them both."

Iruka bowed his head, his hands trembling in their grasp of the other's forearms.

"And this someone this poor boy reminded you of?" Iruka whispered, his conscience making him dread the answer.  The silence dragged for a moment, building the tension.

"Naruto's lucky, you know.  He considers you his own personal hero."

"Ah!" Iruka cried, squeezing his eyes shut as guilt and regret and true shame swamped him.  He couldn't look at the jounin – a man with years of experience and hundreds of kills.  Didn't want to see the mockery he knew had to be there; for a humble school teacher, a low-talent chuunin who would never be jounin, idolized by a desperate, lonely boy.

It was Hatake Kakashi who Naruto should consider his hero… and yet…  He fell to his knees, oblivious to the hard tiles that bruised them.  Kakashi deftly shifted his grip as he sagged, hands sliding up Iruka's arms as he went until they surrounded his wrists as tightly as iron bands.

"Iruka! What…?"

He drew a sobbing breath. Let it out sharply. His voice shuddered. "Why?  I failed him for so long... refused to see his pain... scorned him like all the rest… and I don't…."

"Stop. This isn't the place for this," the other muttered sharply, interrupting him. Then one hand released a wrist. He caught the sense of a gesture hastily made before a tight swirl of energy carried them both away.  The strength of the chakra spell made his head reel during the transition.  In only seconds, his trained senses detected a markedly smaller space surrounding them; it was certain that they were no longer in the Hokage's main hall.  

But when his eyes flew open expecting to see just a side room or a closet, he blinked around in shock, instead, at an unfamiliar apartment.  Messy, with books, scrolls and kunai scattered on a low table in the center of the room.  Framed pictures and potted plants and gleaming shuriken lay jumbled on a windowsill that overlooked one of the busier market streets.  There was a single unmade bed.  A trunk of clothes.  A kitchen area with one cup, one bowl, one pair of sticks stacked neatly in the drainer.  It had to be Kakashi's apartment.  

Teleportation was a Wind jutsu.  All shinobi could teleport short distances but teleportation over a distance like this was a far more difficult skill to master. Yet Kakashi had managed it with seeming ease despite being burdened with another body.

Master of One Thousand Techniques.  Sharingan Kakashi. The Copy Ninja.  An Elite Jounin of Konoha Village.  Naruto's teacher.  The one Naruto should respect.

Iruka slumped all the way to the floor, freed from the jounin's iron grasp.  He tilted his head back and stared up at the other man, tears already welling in his eyes, only to have them meet a furious pair of eyes staring down at him.

_Both_ eyes.  Kakashi had shoved up his _hitai-ate_ to expose the always-hidden left.  Its lid was bisected by a livid scar, he saw, which ran down the cheek under the mask below, yet the eye itself gleamed at him unmarred.  Deep red.  The color of dull fire. Around the pupil, in the iris, rotated three glowing points.  Even knowing what it was, what it could do, that eye with its points of light, he found himself staring at them, mesmerized.

"Don't look at them -- you'll pass out."

He shook himself, tried to force himself to look away, but his gaze was drawn right back to those whirling points.  Until a hand came up and covered his eyes.  He leaned into the other man's touch, relieved, feeling shielded from that tempting sight.  After a moment, Kakashi began to speak, his tone matter-of-fact.

"After I killed Haku and crippled Zabuza, Gatou, his employer, arrived with a hundred men to kill him.  We no longer had reason to fight."

Iruka started, coming out of his haze partially.  Betrayal. All too often a shinobi's fate.  He didn't want to hear any more.  But he didn't move away; knelt there instead helplessly like a man waiting for death.  

"Gatou taunted Zabuza a bit, threatened us as well, but then he took a kick at Haku's body… Naruto tried to rush a man with a hundred mercenaries standing behind him, screaming about desecration and why didn't one of us do something to stop it.."

Iruka listened to the low voice, the shinobi part of him horrified to hear of Naruto's rashness, but another, smaller part of him gladdened by the boy's defiance.

"I stopped him. Told him to let it go."

Iruka drew an unsteady breath.  Held it as the jounin continued.

"He started to scream at us… words that seemed so childish… and yet…"

In the darkness behind his eyes, there was a flicker and then Iruka saw the bridge in the Land of the Waves…  where concealing mist was finally shredding away into a cruel blue sky… a crowd of armed men like a smudge of disaster hovering near the edge of the bridge… a slim body lying stretched out on the unforgiving concrete, eyes closed…  a short fat man in an expensive suit standing over the corpse, who then spat on it…

_…There was a pained roar of outrage from beside him.  His hand darted out with impossible speed and caught something.  Jerked it to a sharp halt._

It was Naruto's back in front of him, his hand -- no, Kakashi's hand, he realized suddenly -- clenched tightly in the boy's dirtied collar to keep him from rushing forward. A bloodied figure in black, with once white, but now red and brown stained bandages wrapped around his lower face, stood two strides away, arms hanging uselessly at his sides.  Iruka recognized Zabuza at once from the alert bulletins that had been circulated between the villages since he went renegade.

Naruto was bristling with outrage, one extended finger pointing directly at Zabuza.

"Hey, why don't you do something?! He worked for you!  He was practically your slave!!"

"Like what?" the rogue ninja said flatly, his face turned away. "Haku is dead."

Naruto practically vibrated in place. "But you should care!  That fat scumbag is desecrating him!!"

"…Gatou's been using me… and I used Haku.  Weren't you listening?  It's a shinobi's lot.  All of us are either users or tools… or both," Zabuza said, his voice starting out low, then growing in strength until it was a harsh growl. "I didn't value Haku for himself… but for the taint his blood carried… and for what his talents could do for me.  I apologize for nothing."

He could see Naruto reel as if struck, then slump, bending his spiky yellow head until his chin must have been buried against his chest.  

"You… do you really mean that?" the boy said, his voice hollow with disillusionment and pain.

Zabuza stood silent.  Face averted.

Kakashi spoke, and it was like the words came from his own mouth -- or straight from the Shinobi Code.  "Stop it, Naruto!  Leave him alone.  Our quarrel is over.  Besides which…" But Naruto burst into sudden motion, breaking free of Kakashi's hold with an eel-like twist.  The boy dashed forward until he was within striking range of Zabuza but didn't attack, instead coming to a sharp halt and planting his feet, outrage radiating from his very stance.  "SHUT UP!!!" he screamed at his teacher, his voice cracking wildly even as he pointed a shaking finger at the crippled ninja beyond, "HE'S STILL MY ENEMY!"

Silence reigned for a handful of heartbeats as no one moved.  Then he heard an annoyed sound from the fat man in the suit, Gatou.  Kakashi's gaze didn't even flicker toward the non-threat as the man spoke. "Who is that obnoxious brat?  He's been making quite a nuisance of himself!"

Naruto ignored the fat man as well to jab a finger toward the corpse at the fat man's feet.  A boy only a year or two older than Naruto or Sasuke, Iruka could see.  From the size of the hole in his chest he was quite dead. "He… He really cared about you!!" Naruto screamed at Zabuza. "But you think that's just nothing, that he was nothing. You don't feel a thing!"  Naruto drew a sharp sobbing breath, and he could hear the thick grief rise and crest in the boy's voice. "Are you really that heartless?" Knew then that there were tears streaming down the young genin's face even though his back was to Kakashi who knelt behind him, weary, but ready. "Is that how you get… when your powers are as strong as yours?"  Kakashi flinched even as open sobs began to shake the compact form clad in orange before him. "HE GAVE HIS LIFE FOR YOU!" Naruto screamed suddenly, hands in fists quivering at his side.  Then his voice trailed away in a deep sniffle, his head sagging forward again, as if the weight of his own words were crushing him. "He died… without any of his dreams ever coming true.  To die only as a tool… That's too much, too cruel…"

Silence, thick and deadly and raw, spread from the boy.  The blood-stained figure standing beyond him didn't move.

"Kid."  Naruto lifted his head as the criminal rogue lifted his as well and turned his cheek slowly to reveal the sliver tears sliding silently down a bruised and blooded face, agony reflected in the man's twisting features. "Not… another word…"

Naruto froze and simply stared at his enemy as the man cried silently for his mere 'tool'. After a moment Zazuba cleared his throat.  Spoke low and slow.  "Kid, what Haku did… was not just for me.  While we fought, he broke his heart… over you… and your friends… that's the truth."

The rogue began to chew the bandages over his mouth, tearing and spitting them out so that his mouth was free.  And Iruka could feel the man's chakra focus and build.  Abruptly he realized where this would end… and how.  "He was too kind… too gentle.  You're right, you know.  I'm glad my last battle… was against you… boy."

Naruto quivered, startled. "Huh?"

"Say what we will," Zabuza said his voice hardening, "do what we will, in the end, we shinobi are still just people after all… with feelings all-too-human.  And I've lost… everything."

The hand over his face flexed sharply and the images and sounds blurred abruptly into darkness. Iruka swayed, crumpling forward with a cry even as a hard arm caught him and steadied him.  Drained by what he had seen, he lay limply against Kakashi's shoulder and chest, body shaking as tears ran freely down his cheeks from tightly closed eyes.

"I can teach him the skills that will give him a fighting chance to reach his goals, Iruka-sensei," Kakashi said, his voice suspiciously tight. "But only you can give him what he needs to reach it…"

"…acceptance," Iruka said, his hands rising to the arm that held him steady, gripping it.  He was braced between the other's spread knees.  Could feel the ebbing of that powerful chakra back into deceptive stillness.

"No… love," Kakashi said gruffly.  Iruka's eyes flashed open in shock, yet he could not move away.  He knelt there, unmoving, eyes wide, as Kakashi drew a deep breath, the motion of the other man's chest rocking him slightly.

"There's something else you should know.  Something I have told no one else. Yet."

Iruka tensed sharply, made to shift and look up at the other man, alarmed, but a hand cupped the back of his neck and held his head firmly in place against the other's shoulder.

"When Sasuke fell, Naruto thought he was dead.  He went… well, berserk, is the only way to put it.  And the seal… cracked.  With that chakra Naruto nearly destroyed the boy Haku by himself…"

"The Nine Tails?" Iruka breathed out, horrified.

"Yes."  Kakashi sighed heavily. "I don't know what stopped it from breaking free completely… but it must have been Naruto himself.  And I suspect it was only because of that something you gave him."

Iruka shut his eyes again. Quivered in horror and dread.

"He believes in you, Iruka-sensei.  Idolizes you.  And it has nothing to do with ninja ability."

Iruka jerked, shamed that Kakashi had so easily seen his feelings of inferiority even as he was overwhelmed by the idea that only his acceptance of the boy Naruto had kept the Nine Tails contained.  So small a thing… to become so vital a strength.

"Do you love him?"

Coming from the jounin, the question startled him badly, throwing him even further off balance.  It wasn't the shinobi way to dwell on feelings.  To admit them or show them.  They could be turned against you far too easily if that happened.  Kakashi had to know that better even than he.  But Zazuba's pained words from the memory Kakashi had shared with him still echoed inside him.

_"…in the end, we shinobi are still just people after all…"_

He remembered Naruto's outrage and pain -- for a boy who should have been only his enemy.  His desperate tears.  His raw grief.  Iruka clutched tighter to Kakashi's arm.  "Yes.  I love him."

He felt the heat of breath against his hair before Kakashi laid his cheek on the top of his head.  Iruka held his own breath in surprise, frozen, amazed.

"Please… don't stop," Kakashi whispered.

\- - end - -


	2. Chance Encounter

~*~*~*~

He was walking to the teacher's room, two hours after his last class, a towering stack of loose-bound books perched precariously in his arms.  Today he'd been excused from serving in the mission room -- and this was why.  The stack he held was student copy books that needed to be graded within the next two days. The stack was high enough that he had to peer around it from time to time to keep his bearings, because most of his mind was focused on the upcoming spring exams and the probability of certain problematic students passing the competency review rather than on his surroundings. He was also musing on the likelihood of a certain genin returning from his mission this afternoon and stopping by Iruka's apartment hoping for a treat of ramen.  Which he would be unable to provide, seeing as he was currently nose-deep in copy books.  At the back of his mind, as always, lurked the knowledge that certain reports were never, ever handed in on time -- and probably hadn't been even though he wasn't there to receive them -- and why was that anyway when the missions had been so light for Cell 7 lately?  

Was he an ogre for expecting them within the week?  He thought not.  It wasn't unreasonable, what he asked.  Technically, they were due within a day.  If the Hokage decided to audit him, he could be in trouble for not having those reports to hand.  He was being more than understanding - going out of his way, actually - by allowing such laxity.  So why couldn't the other cooperate?  Or at least seem even mildly contrite?  He frowned slightly, increasing his pace unconsciously and closing his eyes for a moment, shaking his head in disgust over the other's notorious laziness where paperwork was concerned.

Therefore the body he encountered so abruptly was completely unexpected.

As was the mutual oof! and the scattering of copy books like leaves.  He fell one way as the other sprang nimbly aside; Iruka landed awkwardly despite his training, bruising his elbow on a pathway stone.  Well, he did manage to catch half the stack of books, at least, and that had likely affected the gracefulness of his landing, but the top half of the stack spilled across the pathway regardless.

He glared at the mess.  Annoyed.  Weary.  Aggravated.  A doodled-on book cover was abruptly thrust before his eyes.  He blinked it into focus, then blinked again as it was then set neatly on top of the stack in his arms.  His gaze traveled up from the half-gloved hand that had placed it to the arm with its red-black-swirl patch on blue, jumped from there straight across to a familiar swathed, nearly obscured face.  Silver hair bristled wildly above, only confirming the identity of his inadvertent collision.  Hatake Kakashi. The hidden face promptly grinned at him, the single visible eye crinkling in mild amusement.

"Oops?"

"Kakashi-sensei," he said, sighing heavily in faintly embarrassed exasperation.  "My apologies, I didn't see you there."  And how had he taken a jounin like that unawares anyway?  Particularly carrying all those books.  He looked around at the rest of the mess spread about him, sighed again.  They'd been in order by class too.

He carefully set the remaining books down on the ground beside himself so that the stack didn't tip over.  Another battered book appeared in front of his face.  Pages fluttered as it was jiggled.

"On the stack, if you please," he said stiffly, reaching for another book on the ground himself. The book in front of his face, thankfully, vanished.

"Are all these from your classes?"  There was only bored inquiry in the tone.  He tried not to bristle as he crawled along the paving stones and over grass gathering up more books.

"Yes," Iruka said tightly.

He heard a familiar scratching sound.  Kakashi-sensei certainly scratched his head a lot.  Perhaps, Iruka thought darkly as he smoothed out the bent cover of yet another copy book, he had dandruff.  Or maybe head-lice.  The unkind thoughts made him feel petty.  It was unworthy of him to think that way.  Particularly since Kakashi-sensei had gone out of his way to reassure him about Naruto's progress that day.  Even if he still didn't know quite what to make of the man's actions.  Holding him like that while he cried... he hadn't seen him since that day, actually.  Back rigid, embarrassment flaring, Iruka quickly stacked up a half a dozen more books.

"That's a lot of students.  More than the regular load, isn't it?  You popular or something?"

Iruka sat back on his heels abruptly and stared at the other man.  Kakashi was crouched nearby as well, all the books that had fallen near him already neatly stacked beside him.  It was only the few near Iruka's hands that remained to be gathered.

"Er... I... No, it's just that..." His mind blanked and he fell silent.  Was he?  Granted, he did get a lot of transfer requests.  But since Mizuki went rogue, the pressure had simply been greater on the remaining teachers.  That was all.

"We're still short staffed. I do what I can," he said quietly, bowing his head and gathering up the last few books quickly.

"Aa.  Meaning you can't say no, eh?"

He jerked his head up sharply and glared at the other man, but once again there had been no mockery in the jounin's voice.

"Thank you for your help, Kakashi-sensei," Iruka said stiffly, shifting the smaller stack on top of the larger one and aligning the spines carefully.  He reached for the stack Kakashi had gathered, but the other man grabbed it first and rose to his feet.  It was nearly a third of the pile.

"I've got these.  Then you'll be able to see what's in front of you."

Iruka eyed the jounin sharply again, but the words were still only bland. The single eye met his gaze steadily.

He seemed sincere.  There was no good reason to argue the offer.  Forcing himself to relax his suspicions, Iruka gathered up the bigger stack carefully then started along the pathway to the offices again.

He could hear the slow shuffle of Kakashi's sandals behind him.  It was deliberate, of course.  He flushed faintly at the effort the jounin was going to.  The walk to the offices was made in silence which should have been relaxing, but his nerves were still unaccountably jangled.  It was a relief when he finally reached the entrance.  He leaned one shoulder against the doorframe, grabbed the latch with the far hand, all the while juggling the stack in his arms carefully, yet eager to get inside and away from the other man the sooner.  A half-gloved hand caught the door once he'd elbowed it open and drew it the rest of the way wide. He gave a reluctant grunt of thanks and walked through.

"In the teacher's lounge, if you please," he instructed his chance assistant, striding off that way himself.  The halls were empty, as most of the other teachers had already gone home.  He could no longer hear the shuffle of sandals behind him, but that didn't mean the other man wasn't following.  When he reached the lounge door, he was proved right.  A half-gloved hand shot over his shoulder and slid the door open for him.  He glanced sideways at the other, caught the gaze crinkled with amusement again and glanced just as hastily away.

Why did the other find him so amusing?

He strode to his desk and dropped the stack with a thump in the middle of it. He was glad to finally get them out of his arms.  It felt a little better being ready for action again.  He startled as a shoulder brushed his. Kakashi set his own stack beside the first, lining them up carefully so the spines met.

"You'll grade all of these tonight?"  There was a touch of grudging respect in the other man's voice.  Or maybe it was just disbelief that anyone would willingly expend such effort on mere students.

Iruka stared at the two stacks.  Nearly forty books in all.  A week's worth of lessons in each.  It would take him hours and hours to check them all.  He sighed before he could stop himself.

Beside him, Kakashi stuck his hands into his front pockets, shoulders slouching into his usual lazy pose, and glanced at him sidelong.  The single eye glittered at him oddly.

Iruka stiffened self-consciously under that gaze. "No. But I need to get a good start on them.  I should be here for several hours more tonight.  Why?"  He shifted on his feet.  Wondered how he could get the other to leave now that his task had been completed.

"Hn.  Well.  It's Friday night."

Iruka narrowed his gaze, annoyed.  He had no one waiting for him at home.  The day of the week hardly mattered to him.  "Ah. You have somewhere to be?" he said, trying not to sound too hopeful.  Maybe the other man would leave soon and let him get to his work.

"Ichiraku's not a bad place."

Iruka started at the name of Naruto's favorite ramen stall.  He turned toward the other man, face going still, a touch of guilt stirring.

"Missions have certainly been light lately," Kakashi continued with seeming unconcern, tipping his chin up slightly and watching Iruka openly now.

Which definitely meant pay had been light. Given the way Naruto ate, the boy was likely out of both money and food for the month.  He'd be hungry.  Iruka nodded at the jounin once.

"Thank you, Kakashi-sensei for… your assistance with the books," he turned away from his desk briskly, oddly unable to thank him for the indirect news of Naruto's plight.  The boy was too proud to ask for help, he knew. No matter how hungry he might get.  Guilt surged higher in Iruka.  He should have been paying closer attention to the boy. "Oh. Would you please turn off the lights when you leave?" The last he threw over his shoulder as he headed for the door.

He heard a soft chuckle from the man still standing, slouch-shouldered and hip-shot, in the middle of the room behind him.  "Going home after all?"

He was glad he was facing away from the other man. The flush on his face was most unprofessional. He rubbed his scar where it ran across the bridge of his nose with a knuckle, ducking his head slightly. "Er, yes, I think so."

The chuckle had been a pleased sound and not mocking at all. There was no reason for it to send that odd wash of warmth through him. Before he could embarrass himself further, he hurried through the door.

As he slid it closed behind him, he heard the other man say, almost fondly, "Ah. I thought you would."

He didn't dare look back.

\-- end --


	3. Afternoon Missions

~*~*~*~

Iruka sat behind the mission desk, chin propped in one cupped hand, eyes closed.  It was late in the afternoon and the sun was shining low and warm into the room through the trees outside the windows.  They'd opened one of them earlier, hoping a breeze might stir the still air inside, but it hadn't.  The air in the room was still stuffy and thick.  Over time, a patch of sunlight had moved across the floor until now it fell straight on his back, warming him through his vest.  Lunch in the canteen had been nigiri and tofu-heavy miso soup – far too filling for the weather.  Beside him, the Hokage sat slumped in his chair, arms folded over his chest, robes trailing on the wooden floor.  The sweet scent of his pipe smoke filled the air.

"Late again, eh?" the Hokage said gruffly, mumbling the words around the stem of his pipe.

"Aa," Iruka agreed without opening his eyes.  He was feeling pleasantly sleepy.  His duties were done and his paperwork filed, all he had to do was man the desk until closing which was barely half an hour away.  He would have drifted off already, if only the Hokage weren't sitting beside him, the fact prickling his conscience.  Of course, if the Hokage hadn't just spoken he might have thought the old man had drifted off already himself.  Ninja learned to sleep in just about any position early in their training.  Which made classes extraordinarily difficult to teach on warm days like this after lunch.  The snoring often interfered with his lectures, but it did help sort out the problem kids.  Which would then necessitate more time spent training them to sleep without snoring.  Always a challenging lesson.  Ah. A ninja's life was tough sometimes.

He let out a slow, gusting breath.  Shifted his elbow a bit where it was propped on the desk just to keep it from going numb and let his eyes drift open slightly to scan the room.

There was a familiar, smugly grinning masked face propped atop hands folded flat on the table -- right in front of him.  He was being watched with unwavering intensity from one crinkled eye.  
   
"K-Kaskashi-sensei!" Iruka yelped, leaping up and rocking back in his chair sharply, his eyes flashing wide with shock.  "H-how long have you been there?!"  

"Yo," Kakashi said without moving from his kneeling position in front of the mission table. The grin stayed on his face as he shifted just enough to lift one hand in a small wave.

Beside Iruka, the Hokage gave a grunt and tilted his broad hat back enough to fix the jounin with a steely-eyed gaze.  Iruka rather hoped the Hokage hadn't known the jounin was there either.  The thought did nothing to calm his still wildly pounding heart however.

"Ah, there you are Kakashi."  

"Hokage-sama."

"I want you to quit tormenting my mission desk people by not turning your reports in on time," the Hokage said sternly.  "I want all your reports for Cell 7 current by tomorrow morning."

Kakashi just shrugged.  The Hokage let out a soft snort, shaking his head slightly.  Iruka stared at Kakashi blankly, still horrified that the jounin had apparently been just sitting there watching him drowse.  Utterly without his knowledge.  Why would he do such a thing?  To humiliate him?  Yet there was no malice in that shrouded smile, only a kind of pleased contentment, subtly different in quality from the jounin's usual air of bland amusement.  A chair creaked sharply as the Hokage rose to his feet.  Iruka looked up at his master, face flushing brightly.  How mortifying to be shown as so unaware and inattentive in front of the most respected shinobi of the village.

"Hokage-sama?" Iruka said faintly, but the Hokage wasn't looking at him.  The old man's gaze was still fixed on Kakashi.

"He's the best teacher I have – don't break him," the Hokage said obscurely.  Kakashi raised his single visible brow high, and the amusement faded from his expression.

"He's tougher than you give him credit for, Hokage-sama," Kakashi said with quiet earnestness.  The old man snorted and fixed the jounin with his most forbidding glare.

"It's not his toughness I'm questioning.  Remember my warning."

Iruka was gaping between the both of them now, aware that they were discussing him in front of him this way for some reason of their own, but was unable to see exactly why.  The back-handed praise made him nervous.  The Hokage shot him a brief, sidelong look that made him feel even more uneasy.  As if he'd been weighed and found acceptable in some way for some as-yet unknown mission.  It was the unknown part that made him tense.

"Humph. I'll expect those reports.  Iruka will tell me if you don't get them in," the Hokage said as he moved across the room toward the door.  Kakashi finally leaned back from the table, shifting in his easy crouch to look over his shoulder at the departing old man.

"They're already waiting on the desk in your office, Hokage-sama,"  Kakashi said, amusement plain in his voice.  Iruka barely stifled a sound of outrage, stiffening in his seat, but the Hokage just nodded, one eye gleaming back at the jounin brightly.

"Fair enough."  Then the Hokage left, lifting one hand in a dismissive wave as he swept out the door.

Iruka scrambled to his feet, appalled by the jounin's attitude, despite being more than familiar with it.

"What was that all about?" he demanded.  Kakashi rose lithely to his feet, moving with all the deadly grace he hardly ever bothered to display.  Something almost perilous crackled in the air suddenly.  Not quite chakra.  Iruka sucked in a startled breath as the one eye fixed on him again, curiously intense.

"You smile when you're half-asleep – did you know that?"

He flushed, thrown completely off balance again.  "Er... I... well... No.  No, I didn't know that.  Thank you for telling me."

The sturdy mission desk was between them and suddenly he was very glad of even that small barrier.  He became aware that his hands were fisted at his sides and he tried to force them to relax.  He was only partially successful.  It wasn't that he was afraid of Kakashi... not precisely.  More wary.  He was jounin after all, and a very senior one.   Senior jounin like him were known for being eccentric.   And unpredictable.

Kakashi shifted, leaning a hip against the front of the desk, the casual nonchalance back in place again.  As if it were suddenly too much effort for the man to stand square on his feet.  Oddly, it didn't make Iruka feel any less tense.  He watched the other man carefully.  No chakra or jutsu that he could detect was in use, but he couldn't make himself relax..

"Done for the day?" Kakashi said, tilting his head slightly to the side.

"Y-yes," Iruka said.

The single eye twinkled at him.  "No books to grade?"

"No."  He swallowed hard.  Wondered where this ache in his throat had come from.

All amusement and pretense faded from the other's expression.  Kakashi went still and calm.  Focused.  On him.  Iruka felt his pulse throb hard.

"Afraid of me?"

"You're jounin..." Iruka began, but a sharp snort cut him off.  He stared into that single eye, mesmerized, helpless.  Remembered the spining sparks that lived in the other, hidden one as if in a dream.  "W-what do you want of me?" he finally whispered, mouth dry, hands shaking slightly.

"Just a little of your time, sensei."  He thought he saw a flare of disappointment, but the  other man's expression flickered into bland unreadability again before he could be certain.  The momentary intensity faded from the air as if it had never been.

"Why?"

"I'd like a little more insight into that team you saddled me with.  What in all seven hells induced you to put Sasuke and Naruto together?  And Sakura as well?  Do you know the endless bickering I have to listen to?"  Kakashi sighed heavily, rolling his eye dramatically and folding his arms over his chest.  

Naruto.  Sasuke.  Sakura.  At the mention of his former students, Iruka drew a deeper - if still faintly unsteady – breath; his breathing came more normally after that.  He no longer felt choked by something he couldn't name.  No longer felt the odd pressure that told him he was missing something... something Kakashi wanted him to figure out.  But of course, it was likely just the need Kakashi had to know more about his team.  That was all.  What else could he want from an Academy-bound chuunin like him?

"Oi, I want to pick your brain, sensei," Kakashi said, eye crinkling at him again.  "Over ramen?"

"O-okay," Iruka said, and wondered if the warmth that filled him then was just from the stuffy room, or if it had something to do with the way the other man's mouth curved under his mask in a distinctly pleased smile at his assent.

"Good," Kakashi said with a nod, and led the way out of the room, Iruka following far more slowly behind.  
   
\-- end --


	4. Sharing Sake

~*~*~*~*~

The evening didn't go quite the way Iruka expected. But then that was almost to be expected whenever he was in Hatake Kakashi's presence.  The man confused him utterly with his odd glances and strange ways.  Made him think things he shouldn't.   Wonder things he shouldn't.  Plus, he was aggravating, perverse and far too sure of himself.  But then, he _was_ jounin.

It was almost a given he'd be trouble.

Kakashi led him to a small noodle shop just outside the main part of town that was definitely not the Ichiraku.  The sign over the door, however, was too sun-worn to read.  The chef of the restaurant apparently knew the jounin well, greeting him heartily as he walked through the faded cloth hangings over the doorway.

He seemed at ease there, waving back to and trading jokes with the man, while the man's wife cried out a greeting in happiness.  They were both old, their hair gray, their hands calloused and spotted with burns from years of working around the hot grills and pots.  But they both had deep smile lines on their faces and seemed content, even if they were long past the age when most sought retirement.  But then, they were far older than most ninja could ever hope to be.

Kakashi claimed one of the small tables near the back of the narrow shop, settling with the ease of long familiarity into the dim back corner.  Iruka had already spotted at least two methods of exit from the supposedly boxed in corner.  He was certain Kakashi knew of at least three more or he wouldn't be sitting there so comfortably.  Iruka settled himself in the chair that left his back exposed with only a small grimace of distaste.  Of course, the chuunin would be expected to take the riskier position.  Not that an ordinary noodle shop in the heart of Konoha was all that great a risk, but then, dining in Hakate Kakashi's presence somehow made him feel almost as if he were on a mission.

The old woman had already had a small bottle of sake and a single cup on a tray ready on the bar for Kakashi, as if he were expected, but when she saw Iruka standing beside him, she had quickly added another cup.  She shuffled slowly around the end of the cooking counter and came to their table, the sheer cheerfulness of her smile nearly lighting her wrinkled face into beauty.

"For the honored shinobi who protect our village so bravely, the first drink is always on the house," she said, bowing her head as she offered the tray to Iruka first.  The shop was small and run down and worn.  He didn't think they could afford such gestures.  Iruka opened his mouth, prepared to insist that he pay, but Kakashi caught his eye and gave a nearly imperceptible shake of his head.  Swallowing his protest, Iruka took the tray from the old woman and set it carefully on the fresh-scrubbed table in front of him.

"Thank you very much, obaasan, we are honored by your generosity," Iruka said instead, nodding to her politely.  The old woman beamed at him, winding her fingers in her apron as she bowed again in return.

"Oh!  So proper and polite. Would you like me to pour for you both, Shi-san?" she asked, glancing at Kakashi, her face flushed with happiness. Kakashi shook his head at her.

"No, thank you, Reina-baachan," Kakashi said gravely. "Iruka-sensei will be pleased to pour for me."  The old woman's eyes lit up and her gnarled hands, full of apron, flew up over her mouth in her excitement.  
   
"Is this the one, Shi-san?" The old woman's sharp gaze raked over Iruka with alarming thoroughness suddenly, almost making him blush. "Oh! You never said he was so young and handsome!"

"Didn't I?" Kakashi said blandly, causing Iruka to glance at him in surprise even as the old woman gushed and cooed over him.  Apparently she thought he was a new teammate of Kakashi's. At least that was the most sense he could make of her odd rambles.

"Enough, woman, let them drink in peace, eh!  The usual for you and your friend, Shi-san?" the chef bellowed from the back after a few minutes of this, making the old woman flutter and bob in apology for taking their time.  

"Aa," Kakashi agreed to the order, his eye twinkling wickedly at Iruka. Who would have bristled and tried to order for himself if not for the broad smiles of approval on the old couples' faces.  The old woman scurried away behind the bar to berate the chef, in a loud undertone, about his rudeness in front of guests even as the chef set to work noisily on what was, hopefully, their meal.  Iruka wanted this meal over with as soon as possible, his jaw already tight with aggravation.

"What did you want to ask about my stu...  my former students, Kakashi-sensei?"  He barely corrected himself in time, his cheeks heating slightly as he remembered the stinging set-down Kakashi had given him at the chuunin exam nomination meeting.  They weren't his students anymore.  They had graduated and earned their hitai-ate.  That was his goal at the Academy, after all.  To help them move on to adulthood as shinobi.  

"Actually, I think I know them pretty well already.  They're not that hard to figure out," Kakashi said, a faintly sheepish tone to his voice as he scratched at the back of his head with his free hand, elbow held high. "It's you I want to get to know better."

Their hosts' continuing chatter faded into the background as he became aware that Kakashi was blatantly staring at him again.  To cover his dismay he turned the two small cups upright and poured warm sake into one.  He offered it to Kakashi with a slightly wary inclination of his head.  The other man took it, eye dancing with amusement as Iruka carefully avoided brushing their fingers together in scrupulous politeness.  

Iruka concentrated on pouring his own drink next, head bowed enough so that he couldn't catch the other's gaze.  Know him better?  Why?  Of course, he still didn't know what to think about how the jounin had so smugly watched him drowse in the office earlier.  He hadn't had much time to think about it, actually.  Or about the odd conversation that had followed between the jounin and the Hokage.  Much less what the old couple here thought was going on.  He sighed heavily. Frankly, his head was starting to hurt trying to keep up with all the surprises and wild shifts of mood the jounin seemed to bring on.

From the corner of his eye, he saw Kakashi pull down his mask, take a deep sip of the sake he had poured for him, and then let out a sigh of contentment.  And suddenly – shockingly – the old woman's flutterings made sense.

Iruka jerked his wide-eyed gaze down to the table as his hands fisted there, his cheeks flaming.  Okay.  So it had taken him a little too long to catch on... probably because he'd spent so much of his life cut off from family of any kind.  And it had been years even since he'd last dated.  Who had the time?  But even so, he should have realized sooner that the formality of being asked to pour drinks for someone else was a sign of... involvement.  Of an intimate nature.

He squeezed his eyes shut for an instant, his pulse pounding frantically in his ears.

So now the old woman and her husband thought... they thought he and... Iruka groaned, his shoulders rounding as he bowed his head further.  But then hope struck.

Hatake Kakashi had no family either.  Perhaps he didn't fully understand the nuance of the gesture.  Iruka risked a look over his shoulder at the old woman and her husband.  The old woman was fussing around behind the counter, beaming like a proud mother.  She understood, that was for certain.  Kakashi had to know as well just from her joy.  He didn't dare look at the jounin now.

Iruka let his head sag forward.  What had just happened?  Why would Kakashi let himself be linked with a low-level chuunin like him in the eyes of people he seemed to be friendly with?  Or did that explain why he'd caught him watching him with that oddly soft look on his face back in the mission room?  Iruka's heart thumped faster in his chest.

"Figured it out finally, did you?" Kakashi said quietly.  "I was beginning to think I was going to have to write you a letter or something."  Iruka glanced up, stung, and was surprised to find the jounin had left his mask down.  It wasn't something he did outside the confines of the Academy much.  He must feel truly at ease here in this little dive of a noodle bar. Or else it was Iruka's presence he felt at ease in...  

He stared at Kakashi desperately, searching his face, hoping there had been some misunderstanding.  But the jounin's expression was more serious than he had ever seen it outside that time when he'd first witnessed the Sharingan.  There was no misunderstanding.

"Don't you have a duty to your bloodline?" Iruka asked hoarsely, his breathing rough, his mind whirling.  He didn't really know what to think, to say, to feel yet.

"Already done and properly hidden in another village," Kakashi murmured, his gaze steady.  "I can't even know if it is a son or a daughter.  I have quite a few enemies, you see."

It was a fairly common practice among the highest level jounin, Iruka knew; to make a child and hide it completely.  Both in order to prevent retaliation against the parent and to preserve the bloodline.  Particularly a bloodline with a skill like Hatake Kakashi's.  It was also common practice for the jounin who felt it necessary to go to that extreme to take lovers of only the same sex afterwards in order to prevent accidental births.

There were enough children's graves already in the Hidden Villages.   Far too many.

With his own clan strong in other villages, for himself, he'd had no wish to risk leaving an orphan behind.  And so his few lovers, over the years, had been either dedicated chuunin women who would allow no mistakes or male.  That too was common practice among the shinobi.  With his students to guide and train and keep him challenged, he'd been content and had felt no drive to marry.  At least not yet.  He had time still if he found someone to change his mind later.  Not that he'd been looking very hard.  But then he'd never expected to attract the attention of someone like this… like Kakashi.

"Why me?" Iruka said, his voice barely louder than a whisper.  But of course, Kakashi heard him.

A hand reached across the table toward him.  Two fingertips brushed the back of his hand.  Stayed.  All his attention focused down to those slim points of contact, his blood throbbing even faster in his veins, his skin almost seeming to burn under that touch.  A deep tremor ran through his body, but he didn't pull away.

After a silent moment, Kakashi spoke, his voice oddly thick, "Because you took the boy who holds the Nine Tails into your heart; perhaps there is room enough there for a blood-soaked nin like me as well."

Iruka looked up then, into the waiting blue and red eyes, and fell.

\- - end - -


	5. Night Pursuit

~*~*~*~*~

The evening became a blur to him after meeting that steady gaze, but a few things registered dimly in Iruka's mind.  There was food.  There was the beaming old woman bringing sake again.  And there was the unmasked face across the table, mismatched eyes watching him with cool, if discreet, expectation.

Waiting.  He knew the other was waiting for something other than his frightened-rabbit stare, but he couldn't find anything to say.  Not with those words still ringing inside him, so raw and unexpected and soul-shaking.

There was no one who had wanted him, his presence, enough to pursue him before. As he now realized Kakashi had been.  Lingering.  Meeting him in odd places.  Watching him interact with Naruto.  The powerful jounin who had become chuunin in childhood.  The Hokage's only choice to take Naruto through this most difficult stage of training.  Just as the Hokage had chosen Iruka to help Naruto become genin. And now the Hokage had warned Kakashi to be careful.  With him.

The canny old bastard.  He wasn't sure how he felt about that.  It was just one more thing adding to the confused swirl of emotion inside of him.

They finished the meal in silence, a tension like the subtlest jutsu hanging in the air between them.

The old woman bustled up to bow them out the door once they stood, finished at last; the chef waved heartily to them from behind his counter.  Iruka bowed deeply to them both, feeling as if he had done them a grave injustice by being too distracted to properly taste the food served to him.  Even the sake had tasted like nothing to him.  Only the occasional flash of Kakashi's bi-colored gaze had registered on his senses, making his nerves tingle and tighten further each time.  The old couple smiled at him happily and wished him a peaceful evening, oblivious to the apprehension he felt as he walked to the draped doorway.   

Then he heard Kakashi answer the old woman's entreaty for them to return again some day with a quiet assurance that of course they would.  And soon.

As if it were a given they would return together.  Iruka's heart leaped in his chest again, his throat going unaccountably tight.

But when he glanced sharply back at his companion, blood pounding in his ears, Kakashi's face was an impassive blank, the red eye and scarred cheek hidden behind the shield of hitai-ate and mask once more.  The single visible brow rose in silent query, but Iruka turned away without a word, stepping quickly outside.

The jounin was beside him in seconds, standing slouched with his hands already stuffed deep into his pockets.

"Walk with me?"

The restaurant was located on a narrow side street, but even so it wasn't completely void of traffic.  Sunset had passed recently, leaving the gloaming light to slowly fade in the deep valley of the street.  Iruka tilted his head back and stared beyond the tops of the close-set buildings that surrounded them.  A tangle of power lines interrupted the darkening view of the cliff face behind the city carved with the profiles of past Hokage.  He took a deep breath of the cooling evening air and let it out slowly.  Felt his nerves settle as he did so, calm returning to him at last.  This was home.  His village.  The place he had been born.  And he was shinobi; living the life his parents had wished for him to the best of his ability.  He only hoped their spirits were at peace and viewed his efforts to honor their memories with compassion.  For the proud, lonely boy who needed him so very badly.  And now, this man...  

A lightness filled him.  He scarcely recognized it as hope.

Iruka glanced sideways at Kakashi, the corner of his mouth curving up slightly as he saw the other man start.

"If you catch me," he said, and leapt up the side of the building across the way in an eyeblink.

A long stretch, a hasty grab and he was over the roof and gone.  The wind of his passage sounded loud in his ears, along with the laughter that came spilling from his own throat, surprising him.   It had been years since he'd indulged his own prankster side.  It felt good.  He ran.  Free-running for the sheer joy of it through the fading light across the jumbled roofs and balconies and terraces of Konoha.  Aware of the steady flow of his own chakra, the sure movement of his limbs; mind focused on nothing more than the next step, the next foothold, the next jump.  His destination uncertain, but his goal clear.

To run fast and far.  To prove his own strength.  And then to be caught, heady with the knowledge that the one pursing him wanted to catch him.

He jumped high, drew hard on his chakra and somersaulted even higher with the fluid grace of his training, a sandal barely skimming a window ledge for balance as he pressed upwards.  Speeding further into the city, racing across tiled roofs and leaping alleyways.  He sensed the pursuer beside him only a fraction of an instant before he saw him from the corner of his eye.  Kakashi.  Flowing with terrible grace and deadly ease across the unpredictable terrain. Silver hair a soft smear in the fading light that mingled easily with distant shadows.  Iruka changed direction, darting away, flipped himself from one hand high into the air off a drainpipe to land, crouched, on a domed rooftop strung with the tattered remnants of years-old festival banners.

He gathered himself to leap forward again, to continue on, but a dark shape appeared in front of him, blocking his way. Crouched low, braced forward on a single fist, the other hand perched akimbo on a thigh.  From the shadows beneath the shock of pale hair, one eye glittered at him brightly.

"Not fast enough, chuunin."

To his mild chagrin, the other man wasn't even breathing hard, while he was already panting faintly for breath.  But he knew this place.  Recognized it from years past.

"Not cunning enough, jounin," he retorted with a smirk and dived for a false panel that he hoped was still unravaged enough by time to function properly.  He hit the thin wood hard, felt it groan under his shoulder a moment before deciding to spin and spill him down a short slide into the high-ceiling attic below.  

Four narrow, high-arched and unglazed windows pierced the dome at the compass points, letting in the last of the evening light and a touch of a cross breeze.  As he landed, he heard a frantic burst of wings and saw several shadowy shapes dart out through the archways.  Birds startled from their nests by his entrance.  A pang of guilt struck, making him pause just long enough in his crouch for a hand to clench tight in the back of his vest and yank him backwards, spinning him toward a wall.

His shoulder struck sun-warped wood hard, one knee bent beneath him.  He was already gathering himself to leap away when a lean form loomed above him, hands slapping sharply against the wood to either side of his shoulders to cage him in, a wave of chakra flaring bright and wild across his senses.  To his shock, he had to fight back the instinct to draw a weapon, so strong was that burst of energy.   He stared up at the other, faintly daunted when he caught a trailing hint of peril even as it faded from the other man's eye.  Another dangerous one… like Naruto…

"Enough," Kakashi murmured, bending closer, clawing his mask down. "I'll always catch you."    

"Yes," Iruka managed, breathlessness catching up to him as his chakra's aura was breached.  A half-gloved hand cupped his chin, a hard thumb rubbing across his lower lip and drawing his mouth open.  He smelled leather and dust and sake.  Lifted his head, and strained up to meet the mouth that descended to his.

Hot and hard.  Open, devouring.  Mouth on mouth, wet, slick, tongues tangling immediately.  He reached up and combed his fingers through the short hair on the back of Kakashi's neck to press him even closer. Urgent.  Longing.  Felt the hand on his chin slide down to cup his throat, thumb running along his wildly racing pulse.

His own hand clenched in the other's vest, drawing him down, sliding himself sideways until he was flat on the floor, the other crouched above him.  Their mouths still meshed, breath mingled.  His pulse was racing eagerly, his body tingling with life, with rare pleasure.

Somewhere outside, a street lantern flickered slowly to life, its orange glow creeping across the arched roof above.  Kakashi pulled back, his uncovered eye glittering warmly in the faint light.  

"No objections then, sensei?"

Iruka laughed huskily as he met that intent gaze, mouth curving wide, hand pressing down on the other man's neck to bring his lips back to his.

"Hm.  Ask me later."

\-- end --


	6. Harsh Reality

~*~*~*~*~

It was the day of application at last and Iruka sat alone in his silent classroom, hands folded before his mouth, staring blankly across the tiers of empty seats.  The last of the representatives from the other villages had arrived and the preparations for the chuunin selection exam were complete.  It would begin tomorrow.  

As Konoha was the host village for this session, the Academy was closed for the duration of the exam so that Academy staff could assist with administration and security.  It was a village holiday, of sorts, as well.  One that was critical to Konoha's future.  The performance of their genin in this contest would secure their pride and prestige against the other villages.  Promote their shinobi to the leaders of the world as quality ninja and hopefully earn their village offer of the most and best jobs for the coming months.  And yet…

Nine rookie genin were among those being offered the choice this year.  A record for Konoha.  Only a few short months ago, he'd handed the hitai-ate to most of them himself, graduating them from the Academy.  His former students, all of them, at one point or another.

He knew the application forms would be delivered and the choice offered to all the rookies that very morning.

Or maybe that afternoon, in Cell 7's case.

Deep inside of him, a familiar foreboding curled, thick and cloying, whenever he though of Naruto entering the exam so soon.  The boy was reckless, brash, unwise.  All things the exam was designed to punish.  Severely.  And yet Hatake Kakashi had nominated all the members of his team without hesitation or qualification.  A helpless despair washed through him that threatened to smother the as-yet small but surprisingly strong flame that had been kindled in his heart after that dinner two nights ago with Kakashi.

Kakashi. Who had followed him in his impulsive flight across the city with skill and a kind of wild joy.  Who had caught him with determination, the light of understanding clear in his eyes as he kissed him.  And then who had ended their passionate embrace with a seeming ease Iruka soon came to both rue and doubt.  Though it had seemed fitting, at the time.

"Not yet," Kakashi had said. "I don't want to rush.  We'll finish this after the exam." The hoarse, faintly unsteady words easing the ache of frustration and disappointment by reassuring him that he wasn't the only one affected by the embrace; particularly when followed by a brush of unsteady fingertips over his open, panting mouth.  There had been a visible struggle for control on the scarred face of the man crouched above him.  A frown of true regret as he drew away.

And he'd been grateful for the space the other man granted him upon reflection later.  Glad for a chance to think about the full implications without passion clouding the issue. But now, it had been nearly two days since he'd last seen Kakashi.   

The 'chance' encounters had stopped and the ugly specter of doubt had risen in Iruka's mind.  Had Kakashi's pursuit only been a way to keep him from pressing his objections about the nominations more formally to the Hokage?  It was the kind of misdirection and subterfuge jounin could be required to practice, if so ordered.  Even against their own people.  He wasn't that naïve.  Despite Gai-sensei's surprising support of his objections at the meeting, he knew he'd put the Hokage on the spot - even if the old man had not, as yet, taken him to task for it.

He closed his eyes and leaned his mouth against his hands, letting out a slow, heavy breath around his threaded fingers.

He didn't want to be a mission.  He wanted that glittering shine of appreciation and need in Kakashi's mismatched eyes to be real.  He desperately wanted to believe the instincts that told him it was real… and yet… reality was clay to ninja, especially jounin.  Something to be molded and shaped to suit need and duty…

"Don't doubt," a voice said from the shadows.  "This has nothing to do with you and me."  He jerked upright, head swiveling around sharply to face the already familiar form where it leaned against the wall by the window.  His pulse leaped, began to race.

"That doesn't matter right now," Iruka said, pushing himself to his feet, struggling to tamp down his response to the other man's mere presence.  "I'm worried about the children.  They need more time before they face this trial, and much more experience - of themselves and the world."  He flattened his hands on the desk, forcing them to stay out of fists.

Kakashi shook his head once, his gaze shuttered.  "No.  They don't."

He could only shake his own head in mute protest as Kakashi shifted away from his slouch against the wall with a sigh, then closed the distance between them.

To his dismay, Iruka had to use chakra to keep himself from backing away as a half-gloved hand touched his cheek, a thumb brushing lightly across the end of his scar.  The jounin had crossed the room quickly, without appearing to do so, almost startling him.  The visible eye was fixed on him, hooded and watchful.

"You're shit for lying, aren't you?" The normally lazy tone had sharpened.

He fought a flush.  Failed.  Let his gaze fall away. "W-what are you talking about?"

"The truth is you think I'm using you."

Iruka stayed silent, his gaze fixed on the scroll pouches on the right side of the vest that covered the chest in front of him.  The touch on his face was gentle, sliding down until bent knuckles skimmed the line of his jaw.  He swallowed hard, trembling slightly, and was unable to look up into the other man's face.

"They're hungry.  They have to move on," Kakashi said, voice softening to something like regret as he let his hand fall away.  "Sasuke in particular needs the challenge; Naruto will keep up with him out of sheer stubbornness.  It's Sakura I'm worried about for the moment -- she has confidence issues.  We'll see if either of her teammates notices in time…"

Kakashi's words trailed away as Iruka frowned.  The hand came back to Iruka's face, cupped his cheek, the thumb stroking gently beside the down-turned corner of his mouth.  Iruka swallowed hard again, eyes closing as he fought the eager shudder that went through him, the heady elation. "Why tell me this now?"

"So you won't hate me so much."

The baldness of the statement broke his half-paralysis.  His eyes flew wide, startled gaze jerking up to meet Kakashi's.  There was warmth there.  A touch of pain.  Longing.  Not a deception he could pierce, if it even was one.  He hoped not.  Oh, how he hoped not.

Iruka reached out.  Fisted his hand in the other man's vest.  "I can't not worry about him… about all of them."

"Don't then.  Just believe in them." Kakashi met his searching look steadily, making no effort to hide the need that flared there.  Just desire?  Or was it a need for Iruka to believe in him as well?

His hand tightened, twisting the thick canvas of the vest as shame surged for his own persistent doubt.  He drew the other man close by that hold until nearly the only thing separating their mouths was the thin blue mask.  Their breath mingled, quick and hot.  

"I'll try," Iruka whispered, knowing honesty was the only path he could take.  He reached up with his other hand, caught the edge of the mask with his fingertips and slowly peeled it down to no resistance.

He pressed his mouth to Kakashi's as he felt arms close around him, hard and tight, and whispered again, "I'll try."

\-- end --


	7. Calm Before the Storm

~*~*~*~*~

Iruka was in the mission office keeping busy by sorting old reports for filing when the news spread through the administration building like wildfire.  All three of the rookie genin teams had passed the first trial.  All of them.  Including Cell 7.  He sat frozen at his desk, mind whirling with stunned shock as excited talk swirled around him.

Naruto had passed the information gathering exam without being caught?  Naruto?  His Naruto?

A mission sheet was lifted out of his slack hands and dropped back on the stack in front of him.  He clutched after it reflexively, too late even as he dimly realized someone was standing in front of his desk looking down at him.  Iruka blinked up at Kakashi in shock, catching a distinct twinkle in the one eye.

"Ah. You've heard." There was a soft chuckle. "Asuma said I had that same look on my face too."

"How?" he breathed, still overcome.  Naruto was the least-sneaky ninja he'd ever trained in his life.  The boy didn't know the meaning of the word 'discreet'.  Literally.  He wasn't sure Naruto could even spell it.  He'd hoped against hope that the more time the boy spent in Sakura and Sasuke's presence, the more he might appreciate the value of subtlety.  But so far...

A laugh from Kakashi made him jerk his gaze up again as the jounin shrugged and shook his head, his warm gaze still fixed on Iruka.  "Don't know yet.  I'm going to pry details out of one of the proctors later though. Sounds like it should be a good story."

Iruka could only nod dumbly in agreement, still feeling vaguely as if he'd taken a shock to his chakra.  Somehow Sakura and Sasuke had pulled him through.   It had to be.  Iruka silently rejoiced in the proof that Naruto's teammates would work so hard for him.  Clearly, he'd won them over at last.  But a touch of somber dismay struck as well; this was an acceptance of a sort he wasn't sure Naruto could quite appreciate yet.  The boy was still looking for the flash and glitter of a parade, not the simple warmth of steadfast allies at his back.

Still... it was clear to him that Naruto _had_ allies now in the remote Uchiha heir and the Sasuke-crazy Sakura.  

Pride filled him for more than just Naruto, but for Sasuke and Sakura as well.  Made his heart ache oddly in his chest.  Even if the five-day ordeal now to come in the Forest of Death stopped them from advancing through the rest of the exam – he had only a few fears for Naruto's survival there; the boy was remarkably hardy – he'd already passed that first, and perhaps for him the most difficult, trial with the help of his teammates.

Kakashi was still grinning at him from under his mask, the expression rounding his cheek and crinkling his eye.   Iruka returned his grin happily, only adding a slight edge to it after a heartbeat or two.

"You didn't think they'd make it this far."

Kakashi laughed carelessly, scratching at the back of his head with one hand while the other disappeared into a pocket.  Iruka kept his gaze steady on the other man, his smile fixing.  Abruptly Kakashi's laughter stopped, his expression going serious before he shrugged again, but with just one shoulder this time.

"No.  Not really," he admitted somberly despite the amused glitter already creeping back into his eye, "yet they made it anyway.  But they keep surprising me like that, so I have to keep giving them chances."

Iruka shook his head back and forth slowly, letting out a deep, drawn-out sigh as he pushed himself deliberately to his feet, hands braced on the table.  "Kakashi-sensei…"

The eye opened slightly wider at his ominous tone. "Eh?"

Iruka glanced up at him from the corner of his eyes, a tiny smile dancing on the edge of his lips. "I seems you're a better teacher than I thought… so…"

"So?" Kakashi was grinning again as Iruka slowly circled the table toward him, both of them aware of but ignoring the speculative looks being cast their way by some of the other people in the room.  Konoha ninja only, at least, and no civilians since they weren't accepting new missions for the duration of the chuunin exams.

"… I think we need to talk over a few things about our mutual… students."  Iruka swerved away from him and strode briskly from the room.  He paused just outside the doorway to cast a single heated look over his shoulder at the jounin before vanishing in a tidy swirl of smoke.  

Iruka stepped through the teleportation spell onto the roof of the administration building, relaxing his hand from the seal as he took a few steps closer to the two trees planted in a low box built in the center of the wooden decking there.  Kakashi would follow easily, he knew, particularly since he hadn't made any great effort to hide his path.  A carved bench seat circled the box.  The trees' spreading branches cast a welcome pool of shade over the patio that had been made of this end of the roof.  It was a restful and quiet spot above the hustle of the village below.  He smiled and lifted his face toward the sky as a swirl of wind that had nothing to do with the rather pleasant breeze surrounded him.  His mouth curved up even more when he then felt an arm slide around his waist.  He let it draw him back against a firm chest, deep into another's aura.

"Talk, is it?" Kakashi murmured into his ear, cloth-covered nose rubbing lightly along the upper curve of it.  Iruka quivered slightly, raising a hand to skim it along the arm around his waist until he found the other man's bare wrist, clutched it even as he turned his face toward the other's and rubbed his cheek across smooth cloth.

"Hm. Yes.  About the weather, I think.  Does it look like rain to you?" Iruka said, his own voice dropping to a hushed whisper.

Kakashi cocked his head away to the side, looked up.  A low, amused hum came from his throat as he rolled his eye dramatically at the brilliantly clear sky above.

"No.  But how 'bout you get a better look at it anyway?"

Iruka found himself flat on his back with his hands pinned beside his head, palm to palm with Kakashi's gloved ones, fingers threaded.  The jounin knelt above him braced on one knee, bushy head bent over his. Iruka blinked once in surprise. He hadn't even felt the impact with the ground, so smooth and controlled had the move been.  His pulse heated, throbbing slow and heavy in his veins as he lifted his gaze to Kakashi's face. Then he smiled.

The mask was already down even.  Ah.  Jounin indeed.

"I don't think I'll be able to check the weather this way, Kakashi-sensei," Iruka scolded quietly, heaving a mock sigh that went far too breathless as Kakashi leaned even closer, head blotting out the rest of the sky.  And then Kakashi's mouth found his and all urge to tease vanished.

Hot and sleek and probing.  Lips and tongue.  Breath.  Warmth.  A soft sound of pleasure that came from one or the other of them.  Iruka didn't know or care which, his eyes already closed, his blood throbbing heavy in his ears.

It was just like two nights ago.   Except that now he knew the flavor of Kakashi's mouth and craved it.  His mind spun with emotion, with reaction.  There was longing.  There was the relief for Naruto filling him.  And pride.  There was the realization that Kakashi had come to tell him the news himself.  And the thrill of the touch of another again welded to the heat of rising need.  Then there was the bitter-sweet realization that moments of pure joy like this came far too seldom in life to let just pass.  He wound his tongue around the one filling his mouth, lifting his head off the decking to press even closer, seeking in turn.

Hands flexed under Kakashi's, gripping tightly.  He was pulled up then, rising easily with the pull until he was wrapped tightly in the other's arms, cradled against his body.  Heat and hardness, the rustle of vest on vest, the sound of lightly panting breaths as they broke for air at last. Kakashi's lips skimmed across his face to the point of his cheekbone, the end of his brow, the bridge of his nose, peppering his skin with small, urgent kisses.

Iruka moaned, arching his head back.  The lips followed, skimming down his chin to his throat, making his skin tingle. "Kakashi..." he whispered.

"Hmm?"

"Your place or mine?"

Lips froze against the pulse throbbing wildly in the hollow beneath his ear.  He felt them curve slowly, then felt a sharp gust of heat against his skin as Kakashi let out a quick, sharp breath.

"Mine's closer," the man holding him said, his voice shaking slightly.  

Iruka just smiled and closed his arms tighter around the other as they disappeared in a swirl of wind.  

\-- end --


End file.
